Thursday, November 4, 2010

Playing at being a Grown-up

Good Evening,

As I was driving home from work today, I was reminiscing on the past few weeks/months. In the last while I have made a considerable effort to do things the way a mature, well-adjusted adult 23 year old male would. I sent all the paperwork in so that I could start paying off my student loans. I set up my online banking so that I can manage my finances well. I even designed for myself a budget spreadsheet that allows me to keep intricate details of where I want to be spending my money, and where I am actually spending it. All of this in hopes that I can keep myself more accountable of keeping track of my finances.

Out of this come two thoughts:

Thought number 1:
I am not great at organization, but I revel in the challenge that attempting to organize my life brings. I find it enjoyable spending time working on organizing my finances, my room, my schedule. If these things are organized, I feel as though everything is under control. My control. I realize that in this age of technology and social networking that one can be too connected. I realized today that I need to take a break from all of this at times. I need to be able to disconnect. The drive to be in control of my life, means that I want to be connected. To be able to check my credit card balance, phone bill, etc. all online, and pay them there as well. These things along with facebook, youtube, and email accounts means that I could spend hours online and hardly notice the time fly by until it is gone.
Encouragement/Challenge: So, I encourage you, if you're feeling stressed and life is getting too busy...maybe try taking a break from technology and being reachable everywhere you are. I'm going to try to do that this weekend I think.

Thought number 2:
Being 23, and recently graduated from college, I feel as though I need to have everything figured out. I see other people who are my age, married and seem to have things working out pretty well for them. Others may be well into setting up their careers. It seems to me that everywhere I look, there are people my age who dwarf me in their maturity and ability to handle responsibility. Maybe I just feel as though I don't want responsibility, or maybe it's that I don't think that I can handle it yet. I feel as though the past few years have been great in helping me to figure out who I am, and what I want out of life. At the same time, I think that they've taught me that I'll never completely figure it out, and that it's something we learn as we journey through life. Perhaps I need to take time more often to let God have control of my life, rather than grasping at any possible way that I can control it. Although, there's lots to be said for discipline, and organization, both which are weaknesses of mine that I am trying to work on (at times more successfully than others.)
Encouragement/Challenge: Perhaps life isn't just about having everything planned out to the last detail. Take a plunge, do something radically different from what you're used to. God is in control, perhaps we should ask his opinion on the things that we do a tad more often? And also, take time for yourself.

Relax. Unplug. (At least for a short time.)

2 comments:

  1. Hey friend, welcome to the blogging world! I'll link you on mine :)

    I can heartily relate to you in area's of comparing myself to the maturity of my peers...I feel I fall so short--especially when so many of my younger friends are married with kids!

    I think that it can be a healthy thing to examine our lives and see where we are at...I don't think I consciously examine my life enough. My struggle is how that plays out.

    The trouble I'm beginning to recognize is I to easily fall into comparing myself to others and saying "I need to be better!" I have had it really pressed on my heart that Christianity isn't about being better, mustering up maturity, etc. It's really all about Knowing God and desiring to know him more and more. Our maturity and transformation flows out of that, but I think so often I pour my attention into making myself better; I might not outright say it, but its almost a striving to make myself worthy before God (good luck with that, eh?), rather then putting my energy into getting to know the transforming God who has already made a way for an unworthy sap like me :)

    All of this to say that I too am examining my maturity at this point in my life and like you said, trying to let God have control so that he can make me into the mature Christian adult he wants me to be.

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  2. Thanks Ty. I appreciate your wisdom. I just read this after I posted about learning and growing and continuing to "better myself". I think that I needed to read this, because often I feel as though I'm trying to find out the formula for life, or the formula that will help me to be worthy of God's Grace. When it is definitely more about getting to know God, rather than just following a formula.

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